Can’t put these feelings into words anymore
Everyone I loved, walked through the door
Moving from my bed, pacing the floor
Gave my heart, they still wanted more
Losing my mind, hating mankind
Feeling undefined, depression’s bind
Trying not to hear, voices in my head
Depression wants me dead, urging me to shred
“Just one cut,” they say, “pain will go away”
“Just one pill,” they sway, forcing me to kill
Lost and found by darkness, a mess to suppress
Numbness is my address, pain is my stress
Need a piece of cake, or a lock in the oven to bake
Can’t feel, am I even real, will they still love me if I reveal?
Heart beating like a congo drum, louder than the hum
Nobody hears, nobody cares, can’t even breathe air
Molly, weed, or vodka, what do I need?
Fighting demons, they feed, on my pain, they feed
Surrounded by love, but demons lurk within
A fight I can’t win, for it’s internal, deep within
Journal’s my only solace, no one knows my pain
A constant fight against demons, I can’t even name
Introvert coated in extrovert, they see the chocolate
But not the nuts beneath, take a bite, discover the truth, I beg you to docket
Fighting demons, a battle within
Love and pain, numbness and sin
Hoping for help, seeking a way out
Fighting demons, with every breath and shout
© VishalDutia
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